“We simply cannot stay closed until the vaccine hits critical mass. The cost is too high. We will have nothing left to open. We must reopen the economy, but we must do it smartly and safely.” — Gov. Andrew Cuomo (D, NY), ten months after he and every other leftist denounced President Trump for saying the exact same thing, on Twitter

Translation: Election’s over. We Democrats “won.” Time to stop tanking the economy.

“correction: A previous version of this story misstated that Rep. Ted Lieu [D, CA] grabbed a crowbar before leaving his office. He grabbed a ProBar energy bar.” — cnn, coverage of Capitol breach

That’s some quick thinking right there.

“Globally, ethnic minority pregnant and birthing people suffer worse outcomes and experiences during and after pregnancy and childbirth.” — Harvard Med webinar, replacing the word “mothers” with “birthing people” because “not all who give birth identify as ‘women,’” on Twitter

Birthing people: for best outcomes, avoid Harvard Med grads. And Planned Parenthood.

“We need to profoundly change the distribution of resources. I’d like to say very bluntly: our mission is to redistribute wealth. A lot of people bristle at that phrase. That is in fact the phrase we need to use.” — Mayor Bill de Blasio (D, New York City), video via The Hill

And that is in fact why people are fleeing New York City as fast as moving vans can carry them.

“President-elect Joebama — uh, Joe Biden, rather — did finish speaking here just a short time ago.” — Jeff Zeleny, cnn reporter, to “Situation Room” host Wolf Blitzer, quoted in The New York Post

You were right the first time.

“Equitable treatment means we all end up at the same place.” — Kamala Harris, quoted at American Greatness

“We?” Peasants end up equally miserable. Leaders like Kommie live well. Marxism in a nutshell.

“Watching a dozen of the [Bruce] Willis movies from the past half-decade, patterns did emerge. What struck me most is how much they rely on gunplay.” — Elisabeth Vincentelli, drama critic who noticed “more shootouts than I could count, with an absurd number of bullets flying about in orgies of macho one-upmanship and terrible aiming,” The New York Times

Nothing gets past you, madam. Wonder what kind of “patterns” you’d find in horror movies — and Hillary Clinton documentaries.

“One of the things we want to make sure people understand is that they should not be unnecessarily alarmed if there are reports, once we start vaccinating, of someone or multiple people dying within a day or two of their vaccination who are residents of a long-term care facility. That would be something we would expect, as a normal occurrence, because people die frequently in nursing homes.” — Dr. Kelly Moore, pro-vaccine advocate, on cnn

This woman should run for Lieutenant Governor of New York. Cuomo would love to put her in charge of nursing homes.

“I’m counting down the hours ’til he’s gone. I plan to pull him out of there by his hair, his little hands, and his feet.” — Nancy Pelosi, on Donald Trump, to Democrat leaders, quoted at Politico

Stop inciting violence and go eat some ice cream from your $25,000 freezer. Try Ben & Jerry’s Prozac flavor.

“Mitt Romney seems like Nelson Mandela at this point, doesn’t he?” — Katie Couric, to Bill Maher, touting Romney’s likely 2024 presidential run, video via Twitter

No. He seems more like a dog in a cage on top of a rich guy’s car.

“I had a dream Trump was on trial for sedition. And outside the courthouse, a noose was hung from a makeshift scaffold. The noose was made of recycled covid masks.” — Alec Baldwin, on Twitter

I had a dream — that your nightmare was in Spanish, and your wife Hilaria was the narrator.

Photos: Cuomo ©2021 Lev Radin/Pacific Press/Shutterstock; de Blasio ©2021 Erik Pendzich/Shutterstock; Harris ©2021 Matt Baron/Shutterstock; Pelosi ©2021 CHINE NOUVELLE/SIPA/Shutterstock; Couric ©2021 Evan Agostini/Invision/AP/Shutterstock; Baldwin ©2021 Richard Shotwell/Invision/AP/Shutterstock