Crack Artist
13 Dec 2021
Hunter Biden’s new art career has taken quite an auspicious turn. According to Artnet.com, he’s now a “full-time” artist, even though he has no formal art training. Which is totally shocking when you see the immense talent on display.
Hunter’s dealer — that is, art dealer, it must be specified — is Soho gallery owner Georges Bergès, who has arranged a solo show this month for the President’s gifted son. First comes a Los Angeles “private viewing,” and then a New York exhibition.
A New York Times puff piece (puff, puff, pass) describes Hunter’s paintings as “colorful works of decorative abstraction — psychedelic florals and ethereal patterns that look like nature viewed through a microscope, leaning toward the surreal.”
And “surreal” describes the open cash line from (supposedly anonymous) buyers to Biden at $75,000 to $500,000 a pop — doubtless with Pop, “the Big Guy,” getting his standard family-rate cut of ten percent.
But it’s not about the Benjamins. No. It’s far deeper than that for Hunter. “For me, painting is much more about kind of trying to bring forth what is, I think, the universal truth.” Far out, man. There’s more where that came from, as Hunter waxes wise:
The universal truth is that everything is connected and that there’s something that goes far beyond what is our five senses and that connects us all. The thing that really fascinates me is the connection between the macro and the micro, and how these patterns repeat themselves over and over.
You know what patterns repeat themselves over and over? Hunter as the Biden Bag Man. But no, this art connection is going to be totally clean and pure as the wind-driven, er, snow. White House spokesperson Jen Psaki insists, according to The [UK] Daily Mail: “We won’t know who the buyers are. Hunter Biden won’t know who the buyers are … so there’s no scenario where they could provide influence.” Echoes White House Deputy Press Secretary Andrew Bates in The Washington Post: “The President has established the highest ethical standards of any Administration in American history, and his family’s commitment to rigorous processes like this is a prime example.”
But as it turns out, there won’t be a wall of separation, after all, between artist and buyer. Still, Hunter Biden has two words, according to The New York Post, for anyone who questions the big money changing hands for his artwork: “F— ’em.”
And just like that, The [UK] Daily Mail dropped yet another video of a crack-smoking Biden cavorting with a prostitute and talking about yet another laptop he lost, possibly to Russian drug dealers (“The Russians have videos of me doing crazy f—ing sex!”). But thankfully, art critic Donald Kuspit provided a change of subject. In the current issue of White Hot Magazine of Contemporary Art, Kuspit lays it on thick:
Biden’s three abstract paintings would make wonderful stained glass windows in a Catholic church… Biden is painting to save his soul. The aesthetic brilliance and ingenious construction of his three sacred paintings show his determination to do so… [But] Biden remains inwardly conflicted, however spiritually enlightened.
It’s a beautiful thing. And his father is so proud. “My dad loves everything that I do,” Biden told Artnet.com. “And so I’ll leave it at that.”
Joe Biden once said, “Hunter is the smartest guy I know.” Which helps explain what went down in Afghanistan.
Illustration ©2021 Christopher Hiers for The Limbaugh Letter
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