“After ousting Liz Cheney, Republicans prove they’re a bigger threat than 9/11 hijackers.” — David Mastio, usa Today editor, on Twitter

Remember when the media was going to “restore norms of civility” after Trump?

“We feel naked.” — Jill Biden, on no longer wearing masks in light of sudden cdc change of “guidance” for vaccinated people, White House press pool, via Twitter

Way to make the public sick, Doctor Jill.

“I just want to take a moment to mark this minute. Because I found myself welling up [during the cdc’s] exciting announcement. I still find myself welling up, even right now… [about] this day that they say that we can throw these [masks] away that we’ve all been clinging to. And here we are. I mean, we just didn’t know when this day would come, but it feels a little bit like it’s over today.” — Alisyn Camerota, anchor, crying, on cnn

“Journalism.”

“You’re getting me emotional too. Alisyn, gosh, I got goosebumps as you were talking. It’s a really important day. It is. I hear what you’re saying because can we say that and still be really honest about the trauma and the tragedy we’ve been through.” — Sanjay Gupta, medical correspondent, cnn

“Science.”

“We’re gonna make it easier than ever to get vaccinated. Visit vaccines.gum, dot-gov, vaccines.gum, or text to your zip, text your zip code to 438829. 438829. Walk into your local pharmacy without an appointment.” — Joe Biden, White House video via Twitter

Dad-gummit.

“I feel like I’m gonna have to rewire myself so that when I see someone out in the world who’s not wearing a mask, I don’t instantly think, ‘You are a threat.’ Or ‘you are selfish’ or ‘you are a covid denier and you definitely haven’t been vaccinated.’ I mean, we’re going to have to rewire the way that we look at each other.” — Rachel Maddow, on cdc mask guidance, msnbc

Rewire yourself? So you’re saying you weren’t born that way?

“Because he’s a very important person.” — Andy Slavitt, White House Senior Advisor for Coronavirus Response, asked by cnn why Joe Biden has been wearing a mask when meeting with Congressional leaders, all of whom are vaccinated, quoted at The Daily Wire

That’s why the Biden White House calls “lids” every afternoon. vip nap time.

“‘Let’s talk plain English here,’ [Biden] will often snap.” — The New York Times, “Beneath Joe Biden’s Folksy Demeanor, a Short Fuse, and an Obsession with Details”

Great advice. Biden should take it.

“If you think about it, when we were, when I was Vice President with Barack, he allowed me to put together a budget for Amtrak. And it had money for high-speed rail at 200 miles an hour from, from uh uh Char- excuse me, from Charlotte, one, another line going from in Florida down to Tampa. Another line, if we had moved, Gov, we’d have that tunnel fixed in New York now. The money was there to get it done.” — Joe Biden, 50th anniversary of Amtrak, video via rnc

With all that help from Joe, hard to believe Amtrak doesn’t have a high-speed line to China by now.

“Fact Check: Biden Didn’t Reference Building Rail Line from ‘Florida to Tampa.’” — usa Today

Who you gonna believe, fact-checkers — or your lying ears?

“Now, here’s what drives, the driver, uh, in the states [pause] that are affected, here’s what th– you can do, the drivers. Don’t panic, number one.” — Joe Biden, on gas pump closures, long lines, and major price hikes due to the Colonial Pipeline hack, video via Twitter

Yeah. Don’t panic. Just trust good ole Joe. What he did to Amtrak, he’ll do to pipelines.

“Colonial Pipeline, a vital U.S. fuel artery that was shut down by a cyberattack, said it hoped to restore most operations by the end of the week. Since the shutdown, there have been no long lines or major price hikes for gas.” —The New York Times, oblivious, on Twitter

Who you gonna believe, The Times — or your lying gas gauge stuck on “E”?

“You know, if you drive an electric car, this would not be affecting you, clearly.” — Jennifer Granholm, Biden Energy Secretary, on East Coast gas pump closures due to Colonial Pipeline hack, Breitbart

If you ride a horse, this wouldn’t affect you either. What’s that got to do with anything?

“It’s not that we have a gasoline shortage, it’s that we have a supply crunch.” — Jennifer Granholm, Breitbart

Well, that changes everything.

“It’s Not a ‘Labor Shortage.’ It’s a Great Reassessment of Work in America.” — The Washington Post, claiming that hiring is “much weaker than expected” due to “much deeper rethinking of what jobs are needed and what workers want to do”

Whew, what a relief. Thanks, Washington Post!

“Today, there is more evidence our economy is moving in the right direction. This is progress. This is a testament to our new strategy.” — Joe Biden, after employment report showed 734,000 jobs fewer than expected, Fox News

Any more “progress” like this and Jimmy Carter will give you his Worst President Ever award.

“There is a sense that there was a lot of, there was a, the [low jobs] numbers were very, were, were a real fluke. They could be adjusted next month and it could be a very different story.” — Elisabeth Bumiller, New York Times Washington bureau chief, on msnbc, quoted at NewsBusters

“Hey, America: fluke you! The truth is what we say it is.”

“The Mystery of the Missing Jobs.” — Politico

If they couldn’t see the skyrocketing jobs under Trump, they certainly won’t see Biden’s “missing” ones.

“It reflects the reality of an economy that’s rapidly turning back on because of a successful economic strategy.” — Jen Psaki, Biden spokesperson, on skyrocketing consumer prices, video via Twitter

Inflation! Yay! A turned-on economy!

“Reporters blindsided by the return of competence and civility to White House briefing room.” — Erik Wemple, Washington Post media critic, on the White House press corps “smitten” with Jen Psaki, on Twitter

Reporters blind. Heads too far up the Biden Regime’s rear end. Let’s leave it at that.

“Biden’s Poor TV Ratings Against Trump Is Exactly What This Administration Wants.” — The Hill

They must be blissfully happy, in that case.

“I was speaking to this young person … and he grabbed [my] book and he said, ‘It’s like Mao’s Red Book.’ [Laughter] And I was like ‘man, that’s what I was thinking,’ and it was just really cool to hear him make that connection.” — Patrisse Khan-Cullors, blm co-founder and self-described “trained Marxist,” thrilled that a fan compared her book, When They Call You a Terrorist, to communist Mao Tse-tung’s Little Red Book, rediscovered video via The National Pulse

When they tell you who they are, believe them.

“The way I define infrastructure, one of my definitions is the things you just need to get where you need to go. So let’s talk about why childcare is a part of that.” — Kamala Harris, video via The Hill

How about Willie Brown? Was he your infrastructure? You just needed him to get where you needed to go.

“The Dictator in the Dark Blue Suit Is Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis.” — South Florida Sun-Sentinel editorial, which after an outcry changed the title to “The Strongman in the Suit,” while still claiming “DeSantis is on a right-wing rampage”

Some dictator! His full-employment, full-schooling state is open for business and prospering — unlike New York, Cali, Michigan, and the rest of the Democrat-run disasters.

“Even if we get to net-zero, we still have to get carbon dioxide out of the atmosphere. So this is a bigger challenge than a lot of people have sort of really grabbed onto yet.” — John Kerry, Biden climate czar, White House climate summit, video via Daily Caller

If we got rid of co₂, we’d all be dead. Like John Kerry’s brain.

Photos: Jill Biden: ©2021 Shutterstock/Carolyn Kaster/AP; both Joe Biden photos: ©2021 Shutterstock/Tasos Katopodis/Pool/EPA-EFE/UPI; Bidens & Carters: ©2021 Shutterstock/Adam Schultz/AP; Gupta: ©2021 Getty Images/SXSW/Contributor; Harris: ©2021 Shutterstock; Kerry: ©2021 Shutterstock/Romuald Meigneux/SIPA; Maddow: ©2021 Shutterstock/AP